So it has been a while since I have posted, for that, I do apologize. Between work, life, kids, my fiancée, family matters, and life I haven’t had a whole lot of time to sit down and gather my thoughts … however, a couple of events over the past couple of weeks have given me time to pause and reflect. Which I will share with you … read along, won’t you?
Truth and reality are always a matter of perspective, no matter how solidly they are ground in fact of the world around us. That’s a funny thing to say, I know. But my fact is fiction to someone who does not agree with me or doesn’t see what I see. What I see as fact, as hard truth, is not going to be the same to someone with a different life experience or different perspectives … just as their truth, their reality, will seem quite the opposite to me. Someone living in Somalia, or Syria, or North Korea knows a different life than I know. They know a different reality than I know, they know a much harder reality than my “easy life”.
But what happens when you mix the realities in a similar setting … not Midwest USA vs. war-torn Somalia … but Midwest USA vs. Midwest USA? I can already hear you saying “Listen Mick, there are differences between lives even in the Midwest.” Of course there are, I am cynical, sarcastic … but not delusional. Our lives and our experiences shape our reality, our truths, our facts. But when do we suspend those universal facts and adopt a perspective that is more fantasy than reality?
(Now, before you go off on some tangent, I am not speaking fantasy in the following terms: Final, baseball/football/basketball/cricket, sexual, Island, misogynistic, or RPG.)
You see differing perspectives on reality on a daily basis, just look around … go ahead, I’ll be here when you get back.
Notice something about the world around you? Dichotomy, truth/lies, at least two sides to every story, reality slapping everyone in the face … but not everyone reacts the same or treats things the same.
As you all know, I am divorced for over a year and a half now. The divorce process has affected my reality in a number of ways I never expected. In some ways, my experience has jaded me towards ways of thinking that were previously optimistic. But I have found that I have often come to odds with my ex regarding what is best for the Spark. Our philosophies are different, our world views are different, shite our upbringings are different … and that means our realities are different. The solid fact that we do have in common is that we do not agree on what is best. This often makes life difficult, to say the least, for my family. These differences in perceived facts came to blows recently, and I released 18 months of pent up anger and disagreements upon her reality.
In a very personal way, I am waging a war of truth that affects someone close to me, someone who relies upon me for love, direction, and protection. Some days, I feel like I am fighting a losing battle, other days I see the fruits of my blood, my sweat, my tears when I look into her eyes and see that loving smile. While I cannot (and will not) impose my “truth” upon her, I try to help her shape her own world view and personality, to become a better person and a bright example for society. This is the same thing I try to do for my fiancée’s kids as well, though we have considerably less resistance from the other parent. That is the role of a good parent – teach your children, love them, raise them well, and help them shape their own truth, their own reality.
Given that 2012 is an important election year, “truth” and “reality” are paramount to everyone’s perspectives. Our broken political system gives us two options: the left/Democrats and the right/Republicans. Both sides are filled with a number of arsehats whose mission only ever seems to be to convince the voting public that their way is “the truth” and the correct way. Reality is much different than that for each one of us … most of us do not conform to one specific (political) ideology.
I am a political dichotomy, as I am firmly an Independent. I have views that are considered “Liberal/Democrat” and others that are “Conservative/Republican”. So I am a prime candidate to be recruited by both parties … and I want nothing to do with either. Instead of working together to make this country and her people better, the parties spend their time and focus upon proving their “truth” is “right”. Millions of dollars are spent annually to do just that … we are so far apart on our ‘realities’ politically that our elected representatives can’t fix a damn thing wrong with this country … or even give us a working plan to restore what we once were.
Don’t even get me started on religion … especially within the Abrahamic views.
Instead of worrying about imposing our truth upon someone else and make them accept it falsely, perhaps it is time for us to accept that our realities are different and take a long hard look at OURSELVES and see that perhaps we don’t all know the right way or the truth of the world. Working together to make the world a better place to live in for our kids and grandkids should be our priority. So why isn’t it?
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